Let me (re)introduce myself

Hi there! It’s been a minute!

I as I finally sat down and took a deep breath, for the first time in what felt like ages, I scrolled through my blog posts and realized (1) I haven’t written anything in 4 months (eek!) and (2) I never formally introduced myself to you!
It’s been a while, but I’m back. It was never my intention to disappear from the virtual world the way I did, and I even tried to jump back in a few times, but it was never the right time. You might say there was a lot going on *gestures broadly* and I kept getting pulled away.
I’ve spent the past little bit of time refocusing on myself and preparing to come back so this time it’s for real (promise!)

WHAT IS CHAOS AND CROWNS
This blog started as a place where my friends could find all the recipes that I was constantly getting asked about. It became a place where I could write down my musings on life as a woman, mother, and runner, is really geared towards women in this funny in between middle stage of life.
You can find a damn good recipe here (gf/df of course). You can also find a piece of writing that (I hope) will make you think or laugh or give you a moment to yourself.

WHO AM I
I am a dedicated wife to Z (really the most patient man ever), mom to T, two dogs, and one cat … it’s a zoo up in here.
Like you I am living through a pandemic right now and shit is weird, so I’m just muddling though. Some days are good and some days are not at all, it is what it is at this point.
I grew up in the Shenandoah Valley but have been just outside of DC for 15 years now and love the bustle and all this area has to ofter (in non-pandemic-y times).
I”m loud and opinionated, thats probably why I like to write. I went to law school and gave it a shot. My writing was too flowery for legal work. I’m now a stay at home mom and love to craft and bake and cook. It is what it is.
I can’t eat dairy or gluten. But I can EAT.
I am a runner. I could run for days. I like to think of that as my excuse for living in leggings but really they are just the best thing ever so, it is what it is.
I suffered from Post Partum Anxiety Disorder and after years of thinking I was “just type-A” finally realized I was suffering from sometimes crippling anxiety. I am not shy talking about my mental health and think we should all talk about it more.
I like to think I am a good friend but I am awful at replying to texts.
I love learning to things and meeting new people so reach out to me., tell me YOUR story, let me know when you like sometime I write or if you’ve tried a recipe!

And don’t forget If you want to see more of me (and so you don't miss any blog posts) you can follow along on Instagram

This Old(ish) Townhouse

You buy the PERFECT house. Perfect location. Just adorable. Just enough space.

You live in the perfect house for 5 years.

You have a kid,

The walls of your perfect house start closing in on you. WHY DID THEY MAKE SO MANY WALLS IN HOUSES IN THE 80s?!?!?!

You realize you still love your house in spite of the tiny kitchen and lack of laundry room and tiny living room and huge fireplace.

It’s time to renovate.

We are embarking on our own HGTV show, so come on and join us for the ride!

Below are the initial renderings of the before and after for the 2 main floors we are renovating.

First Floor

Fingers crossed, we will be removing the wall separating the kitchen and living space, creating an open living space and better flow for the small 500 square space main floor. Also we are removing the huge, imposing, wood burning fireplace and replacing it with a sleek, thin, electric fireplace.

Basement

I’m referring to this part of the project as “Zach’s Bathroom and Kait’s Laundry Room”

This is where the big work is taking place as we are moving the bathroom from one part of the basement to another, and creating a dedicated laundry space out of what was part of the old basement bath. This part of the project will involve a lot of plumbing and busting up concrete but fingers crossed not a lot of surprises!

In following posts I’ll give you updates on what finishes I’m choosing and how progress is or isn’t (eek) going!

Which part of this rehab are you most looking forward to seeing - the upstairs transformation or the creation of the basement laundry and man bathroom?

The F*ing Fours

We made it through another trip around the sun.  Teddy is “this many” [shows four fingers]. Teddy had an awesome year being 3, he rocked it, really. Now I am holding on for dear life and hoping that we make it through this year in one piece.

Yep … that’s the face

I was told to watch out for the Terrible Twos and when Teddy hit three I heard “ahhh, he’s a Three-nager now.”  But none of that hit our house.  I walked through the world smug and smiling with my joyful and sweet little boy, thinking, “Not my kid.”  Never once did he run away from me in public or throw a tantrum in a store.

No one told me about age four. No one warned me my kid was going to become a possessed manic. I knew he would stop napping eventually, but become an exhausted sleep monster? I knew he would be smarter, but a manipulative genius? I knew he would get older and change but who is this person in my house?

We have hit the Fucking Fours. I”m here to give you fair warning that they exist.

It happened all at once.  One day he was a cute, toddling, little cherub and the next he was a lanky, leggy, fast and loud, maniac.  I was convinced I needed to consult a therapist for this sudden change in behavior.

In desperation, I asked my trusted group of friends what the heck was going on, was my kid going phsycho or was this some developmental phase I wasn’t prepared for. 

My friends told me that yes indeed 4 year olds suck (phew, my kid wasn’t turning into a Lifetime Movie headliner) and this phase is actually called the Fucking Fours. The **what?!** you say.

The Fucking Fours … because they are fucking loud, fucking annoying, fucking scream-y and fucking tantrum-y and it’s fucking exhausting.

My mind knows that this is a really hard age for kids, they are not (for the most part) trying to be jack-asses.  It’s an in-between age, between baby/toddlerhood and real childhood.  Full of BIG emotions and ideas but not quite ready to handle them yet.  Life is starting to become real and scary.  It’s the age of no more naps but damn he needs a nap.  Now he he tired and cranky by 4pm and wired again by 5pm but so ready for bed it isn’t funny. 

I want to scoop him up and cuddle him and make it all better when he is crying so hard that he says “I can’t stop the tears” but he won’t let me, he needs to figure it out on his own terms.  It does makes it that much sweeter when he is ready for a snuggle and a kiss though. 

He may not always be in the mood to hold hands, he might be running away at break neck speed, but he still always replies to my I love you with “I love you all the way around.”

The fucking fours are master manipulators.  They are aware of what you are doing and how to work around you.  Maybe it’s a stand off, maybe it’s a tantrum, maybe it’s tears.  Something will work today for them to get their way.  At least it often does in my house.  Is today going to be the day that mom just doesn’t want to deal with any tears/screaming/mess and gives in to that cookie before breakfast?  Probably.

The Fucking Fours are sometimes so fucking cute

Fucking Fours like to press boundaries with all things making bed time super enjoyable.  The once loved bath is touch and go.  Getting ready for bed is a delicate matter hinging on whether you set out the right pajamas and have prepared the correct books.  No?  Well then back to square one, after he’s calmed down.  But as he gets sleepier, he gets more cuddly and wants to read more (ONE MORE BOOK JUST ONE MORE!!!) and you lay in bed and sing songs like you did just a few months ago.

You tuck that long lanky kid into that big boy bed and the Fucking Fours slide away and he’s just your sweet little boy. 

Until 1:47am when he screams your name and demands you sleep in his bed …